the ology of meme
Posted on 2008-Feb-13 at 10:36
Partly because I wanted to bury the last post and move on and partly because I wanted to play along, here is the latest in memeology.
MOUTHOLOGY
Q. What is your salad dressing of choice?
A. It depends on the salad, sometimes I like Ranch or honey mustard, sometimes I am feeling more Asian (though I’ve been politely asked to stop feeling Asians) ginger/sesame inspired.
Q. What is your favorite fast food restaurant?
A. If I am hung over I want a Teen Burger from A&W but normally I don’t eat fast food. Dairy Queen makes a decent salad but it defeats the purpose when I can’t make it through the drive-thru without a Blizzard too.
Q. What is your favorite sit-down restaurant?
A. It’s been a long time since we’ve been to anyplace exceptional, food, service et al. The place in Seattle with the orgasmic salmon chowder would be right up there though. Most local are redundantly sucky so we don’t eat out very often.
Q. On average how much of a tip do you leave at a restaurant?
A. That depends on the service or lack thereof.
Q. What food could you eat every day for two weeks and not get sick of?
A. Ice Cream. The hope would be that I would get sick of it so it would stop calling my name and taunting me.
Q. What are your pizza toppings of choice?
A. I love a thin crust, pepperoni, mushrooms, peppers, bacon and extra cheese. A heart attack special. Unfortunately (or not) the pizza joints are as lousy as the rest of the restaurants here.
Q. What do you like to put on your toast?
A. Bread is the devil but when I do submit to carb consumption I love it with butter and my mom’s homemade choke cherry jelly.
TECHNOLOGY
Q. What is your wallpaper on your computer?
A. I think it’s a waterlily. Some close up or a pink flower anyway.
Q. How many televisions are in your house?
A. 2, one in the bedroom and one in the basement rec room in front of the elliptical (guess which one I watch more?) and they are both miniature and ancient.
Q. What kind of cell phone do you have?
A. I hate cell phones so when my husband insisted I have one I wanted cheap and easy (that’s how I roll) and went with an LG pay and talk thing. I use it as little as possible, sometimes the battery is dead for days before I notice or bother to recharge it.
BIOLOGY
Q. Are you right-handed or left-handed?
A. I am all right. Lefty loosey-righty tighty.
Q. Have you ever had anything removed from your body?
A. Tonsils when I was four, a child when I was 21 (though he chose to come out before he was forcibly removed), my gallbladder at 24, my uterus, fallopian tubes and cervix when I was 32. Hopefully everything else stays put or I might collapse in on myself.
Q. What is the last heavy item you lifted?
A. Lifting heavy things is a blue job.
Q. Have you ever been knocked unconscious?
A. Only by anesthesia and I appreciated that.
BULL[CRAP]OLOGY
Q. If it were possible, would you want to know the day you were going to die?
A. Absolutely. Only so I could make sure I had done everything by then. Who am I kidding? Even if I knew I would still procrastinate.
Q. If you could change your name, what would you change it to?
A. I always love the black women names that only black women have, like Shoniqua, Myeishia, Chaka Kahn or Lekysha, you never see women of other races with such commanding monikers. “Brenda’ is seriously bland in comparison.
Q. What color looks good on you?
A. I love pale pink, it’s a good color and I like it on me but most of my wardrobe is black… I am a closet ninja.
Q. Have you ever swallowed a non-food item by mistake?
A. If it contains protein and slides right down the gullet is it still considered non-food?
Q. Have you ever saved someone's life?
A. If you asked my mother she’d say I tried to kill my baby brother the day he got into the bottle of baby aspirin and ate them all. If I had been as irresponsible as she said I was (At TEN years old!) then I would not have noticed or called her immediately to get him to the hospital and get his stomach pumped before he OD’d.
Q. Has someone ever saved yours?
A. Nah, I have a higher tolerance for baby aspirin.
DAREOLOGY
Q. Would you kiss a member of the same sex for $100?
A. I’d do it for free though I bet we could make some real money if we charged admission.
Q. Would you allow one of your little fingers to be cut off for $200,000?
A. At this present time of financial duress I am quite sure I would… or at the very least I would offer up one of Heiny’s digits.
Q. Would you never blog again for $50,000?
A. I doubt it, though I would be more productive... or just have more time for Scrabulous.
Q. Would you pose naked in a magazine for $250,000?
A. Of course! If someone wants to see all this for all that they can have it.
Q. Would you drink an entire bottle of hot sauce for $1,000?
A. No, heartburn is bad enough, I don’t need flaming reflux.
Q. Would you, without fear of punishment, take a human life for $1,000,000?
A. It’s not the punishment I would fear, it’s the Karma. My luck the next offer would be a million dollars to someone else to bump me off.
DUMBOLOGY
Q: What is in your left pocket?
A. Lint.
Q: Do you have hardwood or carpet in your house?
A. Hardwood, carpet, lino, tile and laminate flooring, we have it all. If I had it to do over again there would be no carpet. It doesn’t camouflage the dog hair as well as the hardwood and vacuuming sucks.
Q: Do you sit or stand in the shower?
A. I admit that I am not the most active girl on the planet but I think if you have to sit to shower (barring some physical challenge) you have bigger issues than cleanliness.
Q: Could you live with roommates?
A. Hell no! My husband is the first person I have lived with that I didn’t want to kill after a month… it took a little longer with him. I put up with his annoying habits, he does laundry, it’s a trade off ;)
Q: How many pairs of flipflops do you own?
A: You have to understand that I would happily live in them year round but Canadian winters do not support such footwear. I do however find my feet flip flopped throughout the non-snow part of the year (April-October). I have cheap ones, expensive ones, some for gardening, others for camping, some for around the house and others yet (the really cute ones) for work and going out. I’ve never counted exactly how many but I’d guess about twenty(ish) pairs.
Q: Last time you had a run-in with the cops?
A. They know better than to mess with me.
Q: Who is number 2 on your top 8
A. I always get this confused, number one is pee right?
Q: Last friend you talked to?
A. I just sent a Facebook message to Roxanne.
Q: Last person who called you?
A. My former boss called me to book a pedicure. Nobody calls me at home, I am on dial up, it’s the sure fire way to keep the telemarketers (and everyone else) away.
Q: Person you hugged?
A. Heiny is on Afternoon shift, I smooched and hugged him goodbye and then flashed him my boobs as he drove out of the driveway.
CURRENTOLOGY
Q: Missing someone?
A. I always miss my boy.
Q: Mood?
A. I'm actually kind of excited. There is a project rolling around in my head that I think has some serious potential.
Q: Listening to?
A. The growling in my belly and the pitter patter of paws pacing by the dog dish telling me I am not the only one needing feeding.
Q: Watching?
A. More snow falling. *sneers and flips off the snow*
Q: Worrying about?
A. Everything... also how I roll.
RANDOMOLOGY
Q: First place you went this morning?
A. Pee.
Q: What do you want to do right now?
A: Go somewhere tropical.
Q. What's the last movie you saw?
In the theater, PS I Love You (PS we loved it and we blubbered all the way through it) On TV, Superbad (supertwisted and superfunny)
Q. Do you smile often?
A. Whenever anyone is looking.
Q: Are you a friendly person?
A. Yes, despite what you may have heard from my mother.
MOUTHOLOGY
Q. What is your salad dressing of choice?
A. It depends on the salad, sometimes I like Ranch or honey mustard, sometimes I am feeling more Asian (though I’ve been politely asked to stop feeling Asians) ginger/sesame inspired.
Q. What is your favorite fast food restaurant?
A. If I am hung over I want a Teen Burger from A&W but normally I don’t eat fast food. Dairy Queen makes a decent salad but it defeats the purpose when I can’t make it through the drive-thru without a Blizzard too.
Q. What is your favorite sit-down restaurant?
A. It’s been a long time since we’ve been to anyplace exceptional, food, service et al. The place in Seattle with the orgasmic salmon chowder would be right up there though. Most local are redundantly sucky so we don’t eat out very often.
Q. On average how much of a tip do you leave at a restaurant?
A. That depends on the service or lack thereof.
Q. What food could you eat every day for two weeks and not get sick of?
A. Ice Cream. The hope would be that I would get sick of it so it would stop calling my name and taunting me.
Q. What are your pizza toppings of choice?
A. I love a thin crust, pepperoni, mushrooms, peppers, bacon and extra cheese. A heart attack special. Unfortunately (or not) the pizza joints are as lousy as the rest of the restaurants here.
Q. What do you like to put on your toast?
A. Bread is the devil but when I do submit to carb consumption I love it with butter and my mom’s homemade choke cherry jelly.
TECHNOLOGY
Q. What is your wallpaper on your computer?
A. I think it’s a waterlily. Some close up or a pink flower anyway.
Q. How many televisions are in your house?
A. 2, one in the bedroom and one in the basement rec room in front of the elliptical (guess which one I watch more?) and they are both miniature and ancient.
Q. What kind of cell phone do you have?
A. I hate cell phones so when my husband insisted I have one I wanted cheap and easy (that’s how I roll) and went with an LG pay and talk thing. I use it as little as possible, sometimes the battery is dead for days before I notice or bother to recharge it.
BIOLOGY
Q. Are you right-handed or left-handed?
A. I am all right. Lefty loosey-righty tighty.
Q. Have you ever had anything removed from your body?
A. Tonsils when I was four, a child when I was 21 (though he chose to come out before he was forcibly removed), my gallbladder at 24, my uterus, fallopian tubes and cervix when I was 32. Hopefully everything else stays put or I might collapse in on myself.
Q. What is the last heavy item you lifted?
A. Lifting heavy things is a blue job.
Q. Have you ever been knocked unconscious?
A. Only by anesthesia and I appreciated that.
BULL[CRAP]OLOGY
Q. If it were possible, would you want to know the day you were going to die?
A. Absolutely. Only so I could make sure I had done everything by then. Who am I kidding? Even if I knew I would still procrastinate.
Q. If you could change your name, what would you change it to?
A. I always love the black women names that only black women have, like Shoniqua, Myeishia, Chaka Kahn or Lekysha, you never see women of other races with such commanding monikers. “Brenda’ is seriously bland in comparison.
Q. What color looks good on you?
A. I love pale pink, it’s a good color and I like it on me but most of my wardrobe is black… I am a closet ninja.
Q. Have you ever swallowed a non-food item by mistake?
A. If it contains protein and slides right down the gullet is it still considered non-food?
Q. Have you ever saved someone's life?
A. If you asked my mother she’d say I tried to kill my baby brother the day he got into the bottle of baby aspirin and ate them all. If I had been as irresponsible as she said I was (At TEN years old!) then I would not have noticed or called her immediately to get him to the hospital and get his stomach pumped before he OD’d.
Q. Has someone ever saved yours?
A. Nah, I have a higher tolerance for baby aspirin.
DAREOLOGY
Q. Would you kiss a member of the same sex for $100?
A. I’d do it for free though I bet we could make some real money if we charged admission.
Q. Would you allow one of your little fingers to be cut off for $200,000?
A. At this present time of financial duress I am quite sure I would… or at the very least I would offer up one of Heiny’s digits.
Q. Would you never blog again for $50,000?
A. I doubt it, though I would be more productive... or just have more time for Scrabulous.
Q. Would you pose naked in a magazine for $250,000?
A. Of course! If someone wants to see all this for all that they can have it.
Q. Would you drink an entire bottle of hot sauce for $1,000?
A. No, heartburn is bad enough, I don’t need flaming reflux.
Q. Would you, without fear of punishment, take a human life for $1,000,000?
A. It’s not the punishment I would fear, it’s the Karma. My luck the next offer would be a million dollars to someone else to bump me off.
DUMBOLOGY
Q: What is in your left pocket?
A. Lint.
Q: Do you have hardwood or carpet in your house?
A. Hardwood, carpet, lino, tile and laminate flooring, we have it all. If I had it to do over again there would be no carpet. It doesn’t camouflage the dog hair as well as the hardwood and vacuuming sucks.
Q: Do you sit or stand in the shower?
A. I admit that I am not the most active girl on the planet but I think if you have to sit to shower (barring some physical challenge) you have bigger issues than cleanliness.
Q: Could you live with roommates?
A. Hell no! My husband is the first person I have lived with that I didn’t want to kill after a month… it took a little longer with him. I put up with his annoying habits, he does laundry, it’s a trade off ;)
Q: How many pairs of flipflops do you own?
A: You have to understand that I would happily live in them year round but Canadian winters do not support such footwear. I do however find my feet flip flopped throughout the non-snow part of the year (April-October). I have cheap ones, expensive ones, some for gardening, others for camping, some for around the house and others yet (the really cute ones) for work and going out. I’ve never counted exactly how many but I’d guess about twenty(ish) pairs.
Q: Last time you had a run-in with the cops?
A. They know better than to mess with me.
Q: Who is number 2 on your top 8
A. I always get this confused, number one is pee right?
Q: Last friend you talked to?
A. I just sent a Facebook message to Roxanne.
Q: Last person who called you?
A. My former boss called me to book a pedicure. Nobody calls me at home, I am on dial up, it’s the sure fire way to keep the telemarketers (and everyone else) away.
Q: Person you hugged?
A. Heiny is on Afternoon shift, I smooched and hugged him goodbye and then flashed him my boobs as he drove out of the driveway.
CURRENTOLOGY
Q: Missing someone?
A. I always miss my boy.
Q: Mood?
A. I'm actually kind of excited. There is a project rolling around in my head that I think has some serious potential.
Q: Listening to?
A. The growling in my belly and the pitter patter of paws pacing by the dog dish telling me I am not the only one needing feeding.
Q: Watching?
A. More snow falling. *sneers and flips off the snow*
Q: Worrying about?
A. Everything... also how I roll.
RANDOMOLOGY
Q: First place you went this morning?
A. Pee.
Q: What do you want to do right now?
A: Go somewhere tropical.
Q. What's the last movie you saw?
In the theater, PS I Love You (PS we loved it and we blubbered all the way through it) On TV, Superbad (supertwisted and superfunny)
Q. Do you smile often?
A. Whenever anyone is looking.
Q: Are you a friendly person?
A. Yes, despite what you may have heard from my mother.
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